Domestic Violence

A friend of a friend is currently dealing with domestic violence, this is the first time that I have ever been exposed to physical domestic violence at this level.

Sunday night my friend J received a call from her friend R saying that she was currently hiding in bushes with her 9 month old daughter and 10 year old son because her boyfriend and children’s father was threatening to kill her.

J raced around to where R was hiding with her 16 year old daughter in the car and thankfully managed to fine R and her children before the boyfriend did. She stayed at J’s house and the next morning they went over to R’s house to pick up some things whilst he was at work as she had only managed to run out the house with the children.

Whilst they where picking up clothing and baby supplies the boyfriend turned up and went crazy, they managed to lock themselves in the car whilst he was jumping all over the bonnet and threatened to kill both R her children, J and her daughter. He then climbed under the car and starting playing around with things, the car has since been checked by a mechanic and whilst it looks like he tried to break the break lines there is nothing wrong with the car and there is no gps trackers either.

There is a real threat to R’s life and J’s whilst she lets her stay and I am extremely scared for both them, R does not want to go to the police and get a restraining order, I think she is under the impression that if she does that then there is no saving their relationship and doesn’t believe that a restraining order will actually stop him.

The truth is that the statistics are stacked against her…..

  • Globally 1 in 3 Women experience partner violence.
  • 1 woman is killed every week in Australia due to family violence.
  • 7 in 10 women murdered in Australia are victims of family violence.
  • Children are present in 1 out of 3 family violence cases reported to police.
  • A woman faces an increased risk of being killed or seriously injured when she leaves or is separated from an abusive partner.

This is not the first time she has tried leaving but I hope it is the last, J is doing anything she can to try and help but it is a hard situation to be in especially considering there are small children involved.

I have no real idea what is going through her mind, I have being in an emotionally abusive relationship that turned slightly violent but not to this level and even that was incredibly hard for me to get away from so all I can really do is try to imagine what this poor woman is going through.

Domestic violence needs to end, I think that we need to educate young boys and girls that violence and emotional manipulation is never okay, I know I will spend my life teaching my children to respect others and to always treat people how you wish to be treated.

I feel I have more to say but I honestly have no words and can’t seem to articulate exactly what I want, I just hope that for everyone’s sake R manages to leave this man and start a better life for her children.




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